Tegid's Glossary: An experiment in perception and meaning

https://demigrace.forumotion.com/t5-one-of-them-fancy-dictionary-thingies-or-something-like-it-i-think

Demi Grace already has a glossary of terms. Up there, that link, there it is.
It gets updated with extreme frequency, because many of the terms are relatively 'new' on the GSM scene, some of them invented by members of this very forum. Updates occur as definitions are refined, and in some cases where definitions are controversial, I as the admin have two options that I could follow for minimum friction:
a) I pick a definition I like, one that fits my view of the situation, and I call it 'final'.
This is known as the prescriptive or inductive approach.

b) I leave it for my members to discuss, maybe even put it to a vote, and based on their reactions I choose the definition that receives the best reaction, or I just post all the options in order of popularity.
This is known as the descriptive or deductive approach.

The thread linked at the top of the page, the one in the 'terms and PCness' subforum that shows up near the top of the index each time you refresh, that's the deductively-achieved dictionary, the one to which members are allowed to answer in posts, complain about things they think need changed, and make suggestions.

This thread, at the time I post it, will be a word-for-word copy of that one.
I expect over a long period of time, this may change.
Why?
Well, this is the inductively-written dictionary.
This is me, Tegid, saying how I personally define these terms, with as much precision and clarity as I can offer...

...and not giving anybody at all the option of replying to this thread, at least not within the thread.


I expect over time, as I adjust the 'main' dictionary for both simplicity and popular interpretation of terms, yielding entirely to how the users want it written, that dictionary is going to vary widely from this one.
If my own personal opinions about a term change, I will post both my old definition in Admin-crimson text and the revised definition in black text.

Okay, why...?

Simple: This glossary is experimental. It's a learning and teaching tool that evolves as my own perceptions evolve, and its evolution occurs simultaneously to the evolution of the 'primary' deductively-written dictionary on DG.
In a sense, we can observe any changes to my views as being a model for what one could expect from the views of somebody who is totally a beginner at understanding people who are in GSM, or who are on ace spectrum, or who are demi, semi, hypo, grey, etc.
We can look at my older definitions next to the newer ones, read them as, "a person might think THIS way... and then arrive at THAT conclusion, over time."

It's a journal of my perceptions of these words, and by extension, an example for how any person's perceptions might shift and change.

Any time I add a new entry after this post, I will put the title/header for that entry in green text, with revisions in black, and old definitions maintained in crimson.

You'll find that you can't post in this thread. That's okay. If you have questions, you can take them up with me in my blog thread,
https://demigrace.forumotion.com/t46-the-enemy-s-gate-is-down .
If you object to something, you can discuss it with me there, too. Just know that I'll only change the definitions here if my own view of the matter shifts, or if I think of a better wording for the same meaning.

Just remember: the dictionary in the link at the TOP of this post... that's the 'real' one, the 'official' version that actually stands for what the forum members think and believe about these words.
If you find one of my definitions annoying, please check FIRST in that primary dictionary, to make sure that the definition you WANT isn't already there.
Ranting about something I write in this thread as a glossary entry is... patently useless, to be blunt. I'm not here to step on toes, I'm here to test the staying power of terms and definitions, and how and when shifts occur in the meaning of a word.

Thanks for reading this!
Remember, at the time of this OP, the things posted below are identical to the main dictionary. They're both starting from the same place.
I don't know if it'll stay that way.

*commences copying primary dictionary into this thread*

Prefixes and Suffixes:

A- "not" or "without", pertaining to somebody who does not have a specific type of attraction or feeling, either romantic or sexual.

Allo- "other", pertaining to somebody who experiences a type of attraction or feeling (eg. sexual, romantic, platonic) for people other than themselves; opposite of A- and Auto-.

Andro- "man", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people who identify as male or masculine; enables people outside the gender binary to clearly state orientations without self-referencing through hetero- or homo-.

Androgyno- "man-woman", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people who identify as androgynous or present androgynously; enables people outside the gender binary to clearly state orientations without self-referencing through hetero- or homo-.

Auto- "self", pertaining to somebody who experiences a type of attraction or feeling (eg. sexual, romantic, platonic) for themselves; opposite of Auto-.

Bi- "two", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people falling into two gender or sex categories; in society this tends to imply the male-female binary, but it can also apply to non-binary genders

Demi- "half", pertaining to somebody who is viewable as "half (a)sexual" and/or "half (a)romantic" spectra of sexual and romantic attraction; is not the same as Semi- **

Gender- - pertaining to the mental, emotional, behavioural, social, and other nonphysical characteristics of a person, by which they self-categorize and/or are socially categorized as male, female, agender, pangender, genderqueer, gender-fluid, or any other number of gender identities. It occurs as a prefix in such terms as genderqueer and genderfluid.

Gyno- "woman", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people who identify as female or feminine; enables people outside the gender binary to clearly state orientations without self-referencing through hetero- or homo-.

Hetero- "different", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at those of a different sex or gender as themselves; in society this tends to imply subscribing to the sexual male-female binary

Homo- "same", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at those of the same sex or gender as themselves

Hyper- "over", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual drives are much stronger than the average

Hypo- "under", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual drives are much weaker than the average

Iso- "same, even," pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual drives are in the range of normal or average; one who is not hyper- or hypo- romantic or sexual

Mono- "one", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at one specific gender and/or sex. Generally includes homo-, hetero-, gyno-, andro-, androgyno-, and neutro- -romantic/-sexual. Excludes bi-, poly-, pan-, and omni- -romantic/-sexual. A person who does not wish to use homo- or hetero- (thereby avoiding self-reference and implications about their own gender/sex) can use mono- to indicate that they are only attracted to one gender/sex, and they can use it in reference to genders/sexes not described easily through Latin or Greek roots or other common terms (ex. "hijra-monosexual" or "post-op-FTM-monoromantic", etc.)

Neutro- "neither of two", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people who identify as agender/null-gender, neutrois, or gender-neutral; enables people outside the gender binary to clearly state orientations without self-referencing through hetero- or homo-.

Non- "not" or "zero", pertaining to somebody who does not have a specific type of desire, urge, or drive, either romantic drive or libido.

Omni- "all", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at absolutely any gender or sex; common use implies non-exclusive application to human beings, meaning that this person could potentially find other sentient species attractive... provided they exist

Pan- "all", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at absolutely any gender or sex; common use implies exclusive application to human beings. For all other intents and purposes, its meaning is identical to Omni, so until aliens are discovered, omniromantic/sexual would be identical to panromantic/sexual.

Phallo- "penis", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at somebody whose genitals are masculinely formed, aka "penis-bearers", but does not imply either gender or body presentation, nor any other characteristic of the attractor or the person attracted.

Poly- "many", not implying 'all', but implying 'more than one', pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people of at least two gender or sex categories; bi- is technically a subgroup of poly-

Semi- "half", pertaining to somebody who is "half sexually desirous/libidinistic" or "half driven to have romantic relationships"; is not the same as Demi-

Skolio- "curved" or "bending", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people who identify as genderqueer; enables people outside the gender binary to clearly state orientations without self-referencing through hetero- or homo-.

Spectra- pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people over a range of gender identities, sexes, and presentations.

Trans- "across; beyond; through; changing", pertaining to somebody who, with or without medical intervention, identify, dress, and/or function as a different gender and/or sex than the one they were assigned at birth; as an umbrella term includes transsexual, transgender, transvestite; can include genderqueer and/or genderfluid, depending on the individual's personal understanding of those terms.

Tropo- "turning", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at people who identify as genderfluid; enables people outside the gender binary to clearly state orientations without self-referencing through hetero- or homo-. **

Yoni- "vagina", pertaining to somebody whose romantic or sexual feelings are directed at somebody whose genitals are femininely formed, aka "vagina-bearers", but does not imply either gender or body presentation, nor any other characteristic of the attractor or the person attracted.

-curious - pertaining to somebody who identifies at a certain orientation, but who is curious, open-minded, and/or experimental about romantic and/or sexual interactions with individuals who are not in the category that normally attract them, according to their identified orientation.

-flexible - pertaining to somebody who either 1. identifies as more than one orientation, but not necessarily all at once, and ranges between their various orientations, or 2. identifies as a specific orientation, but is potentially open-minded under certain circumstances to being attracted to people not normally included in their identifies orientation.

-fluid - pertaining to somebody who ranges between at least two genders, without necessarily identifying as entirely one or as more than one simultaneously, at any given time. Does not necessarily imply genderqueer, since fluidity can range between binary genders, but can be included in the category genderqueer.

-gender - pertaining to the mental, emotional, behavioural, social, and other nonphysical characteristics of a person, by which they self-categorize and/or are socially categorized as male, female, agender, pangender, genderqueer, gender-fluid, or any other number of gender identities

-queer - when used as a suffix, as in genderqueer: pertaining to somebody who identifies as having a non-binary gender identity, but without implying fluidity

-questioning - pertaining to somebody who is still in a state of uncertainty and/or research about their identity and/or orientation

-romantic - pertaining to emotional and trust-based love, does not imply physical intimacy

-sexual - 1. pertaining to physically-expressed love, does not necessarily imply emotional intimacy 2. pertaining to the chromosomal, genital, hormonal, and other physical characteristics of a person, by which they are categorized as male, female, neutrois, androgynous, or any other number of sex assignments

-variant - pertaining to somebody whose gender, libido, orientation, romantic drive, etc. is outside the social norm; an example is gender-variant (sometimes considered synonymous with trans*), one who gender-identifies outside the social gender binary.

-vestite - pertaining to the manner of dress of an individual, with or without reference to the societal expectations for how a person with a certain body presentation should be clothed; does not imply anything about orientation or gender identity.

Grey / Gray - pertaining to somebody who does not perceive themselves to be at any specifically defined point in the asexual/sexual spectrum, or who feels that they tend to vary between several points on the spectrum on a regular basis

Queer - pertaining to somebody whose romantic and/or sexual habits and/or gender identity/expression/body presentation do not specifically subscribe to the binary heteronormative standards of society; 'queer' is a reclaimed social slur that was previously used as a form of harassment against gay, lesbian, bisexual, transexual, transgender, and otherwise non-binary and/or non-heteronormative individuals and societies

Straight - pertaining to somebody whose romantic and/or sexual habits and/or gender identity/expression/body presentation DO specifically subscribe to the binary heteronormative standards of society

**Many of these words exist as neologisms, and some are not yet entirely incorporated into the full lexicon of GSM.
"Troposexual / troporomantic" were originated by Tegid of this forum; if superior terms are popularized, we will incorporate them instead.
"Demisexual" and by extension "demiromantic" were originated by Sonofzeal from AVEN.

Types of Attraction and Desire:
(Much of this draws on Rabger's Model and the RADAR Chart Model, but I've elaborated on and added to much of it in an attempt to be as precisely clear as possible.)

Primary Sexual Attraction: Sexual attraction to the outward characteristics of a person, independent of any bond or friendship with them; these characteristics can include (and are not limited to) physical appearance, scent, apparent wealth or occupation, openly displayed intellect, and/or skills/talents.

Secondary Sexual Attraction: Sexual attraction to the known inward characteristics of a person, implied to be dependent on an existing bond or friendship with them (since you do not directly experience these qualities until you interact closely on the level of a friend or romantic partner). These characteristics can include (and are not limited to) emotional bonds, bonds of trust, romantic relationship with the subject, friendship to the subject, long-term displays of intellect, kindness or loyalty or other characteristics that the subject finds attractive in the object, etc.

Primary Sexual Desire: Desire to engage in sexual activity for the subject's own pleasure and enjoyment; is related to Physical/Contact Desire, but neither automatically implies the other, since Contact can include things that are not sexual, and Sexual intimacy can include nonphysical psychological acts and details.

Secondary Sexual Desire: Desire to engage in sexual activity for reasons other than the subject's own pleasure and enjoyment, such as desire to procreate, desire to give pleasure to the object of desire, obtainment of money or personal benefits, etc. Relationships that are both romantic and sexual in nature will typically include both primary and secondary sexual desire, in order for there to be reciprocity between the relationship's members.

Primary Romantic Attraction: "Love at first sight", any romantic attraction that occurs without prior platonic friendship. Does not automatically imply short-term acquaintance or interaction, and can be with an effective stranger; only implies lack of prior friendship.

Secondary Romantic Attraction: "Friends that became more", any romantic attraction that occurs after developing a prior platonic friendship. Does not automatically imply long-term friendship, and can be with a relatively new friend; only implies that friendship existed before romance.

Primary Romantic Desire: The basic, general desire to seek, pursue, or be in a romantic relationship, simply to enjoy that relationship.

Secondary Romantic Desire: The specific desire to seek, pursue, or be in a romantic relationship for reasons other than enjoyment, such as the social and financial benefits of being in a relationship with somebody else, or to give that enjoyment to somebody else, or to have help in raising a child.

Aesthetic Attraction: With or without sexual or romantic connotations, and with or without being (a)romantic or (a)sexual, experiencing a desire to view the physical face and/or form of another person or people, due to appreciation of their perceived outward beauty.

Kinetic Attraction: With or without sexual or romantic connotations, and with or without being (a)romantic or (a)sexual, experiencing a desire to view the physical movements, postures, and body-carriage of another person or people, due to appreciation of their perceived physical grace, strength, and/or dexterity.

Physical, Sensual, or Contact Attraction: With or without sexual or romantic connotations, and with or without being (a)romantic or (a)sexual, experiencing a specific attraction to somebody else based on the specific desire to physically touch them or be touched by them, such as hugging, kissing, cuddling, hair-touching, etc.

Physical, Sensual, or Contact Desire: With or without sexual or romantic connotations, and with or without being (a)romantic or (a)sexual, experiencing a general desire (a want without any specific target) to physically touch another person or people, such as hugging, kissing, cuddling, hair-touching, etc. A touch-aversive or touch-repulsed person would be somebody who specifically does not like to be touched or to touch other people, and experiences discomfort from physical contact with others.

Fantasy or Hypothetical Attraction: With or without sexual or romantic connotations, and with or without being (a)romantic or (a)sexual, experiencing dreaming or hypothetical mental/emotional scenarios involving yourself or another person. In common use, to say that you fantasize about somebody is accepted to mean that you imagine yourself in romantic and/or sexual interactions with them, whether or not you are personally romantic or sexual to that person or their gender/sex.

Platonic or Psychological Attraction: Completely nonromantic, nonsexual attraction to somebody and desire to be near them to interact with them.

Repulsion: Personal aversion to romance, sexuality, a specific orientation or identity, or a specific person or group of people. In the Ace community, to call yourself Repulsed is commonly accepted to mean that you are Antisexual, or that to some lesser degree you find sexuality repulsive and causing discomfort to you.

Models, Scales, Methods, and Charts:
(work in progress)

Kinsey Scale:

Klein Sexual Orientation Grid:

Rabger's Model:

RADAR Chart Model:

Tea's Model (temporary place-holder title):

Tegid's Scales:

Issues in the larger communit(ies)

Deference to Majority Allies:

Erasing Language:

Identity Policing:

Inconsiderate Labeling:

Infighting:

Minority Disunity:

Misrepresentation:

Misunderstandings:

"Oppression Olympics:"

Perpetuation of Rape Culture:

Privilege Denial:

Prude-Shaming:

Queer Appropriation:

Slut-Shaming:

Symbol Appropriation:

Triggering Language: