What am I?

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What am I?

Post by Jackson88 on Sat Apr 13, 2013 11:17 pm

Well, the basics are that I'm 15 and male.

I am what you might consider somewhat bi-curious I suppose. I am attracted to females both sexually and romantically and I prefer them over guys, while at the same time I am attracted to guys, but in a non-romantic way. I have just recently been introduced to the term demisexuality and I have found that it is what most accurately describes how I feel. Then again, it doesn't do it 100%. The thing is:

1) 80% of the time I feel like I could only see myself actually enjoying sex, and any kind of sexual acts, starting at kissing, if it was with someone who I really like and who I know really likes me. I don't seem to be interested in doing any kind of sexual act with a person if I haven't known them very well for a long time, even though my sex drive is great. I do get aroused by physical appearance, but no matter how attractive the person looks I wouldn't be interested in actually doing anything sexual with them until I'd be sure that they're right for me.

2) 20% of the time I feel like going out and hooking up with a random person, not getting romantically or emotionally involved but just having sex.


The thing is, I have always been feeling like 1), but the feelings I describe in 2) I have not been feeling for too long. It confuses me because I don't even know what the official term for this kind of sexuality is. I'd just like to know, what am I? Am I like, somewhat demisexual, not demisexual at all, or what term is fit for the way I feel? I don't know if the feelings in 2) are just some kind of phase or if they are here to stay. Any help on defining this would be greatly appreciated.

Jackson88
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Re: What am I?

Post by Halfling on Sun Apr 14, 2013 10:37 am

Hi Jackson Smile
About what you describe in 2), did you actually do it ? I mean, is it like a fantasy you had without doing it, or did it happen that you had random sex ?

I ask that because it happens to me sometimes to desperately want to have random sex but I'm totally unable to do it. I just can't, because I can't imagine to be aroused if I were face to face with a guy I met to have sex...
Dunno if i'm clear..

About your attraction to guys, you are curious about the sex with males, that's what you mean ? Without seeing yourself in a romantic relationship with one ?
In fact, to have sex with a guy, you would have to know him for a long time, having developped a friendship or something like that to be able to have sex right ? It makes me think of "sex friends"... It includes the "knowing for a long time", without the "romantic" part. Does it speaks to you ?

Halfling
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Re: What am I?

Post by Jackson88 on Sun Apr 14, 2013 4:02 pm

Hello~

Well, I didn't do what I described in 2), but the few rare times that I've ever actually felt like 2) I was sure that I could do it and that my feelings in 1) couldn't stop me as they basically weren't even present when I was feeling that way. I don't question myself wether I would have done it or not because I know that I would have, had I been given an opportunity at the time.

The thing about the guys is: I could see myself doing sexual acts with them, but I couldn't be in a relationship with one. Basically, the way I feel in 1) goes for girls, while the way I feel in 2) goes for guys. I don't seem to care how well I know the guy as long as he turns me on because I'm just not interested in getting into something serious/emotional with a guy.

Jackson88
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Re: What am I?

Post by Halfling on Mon Apr 15, 2013 3:07 am

Ok then you may be hetero-romantic&demisexual and homo-aromantic&sexual ? lol That seems odd, said like that, but it kind of reflects what you were saying, doesn't it ?
There may be a better way of saying that though, anyone ?

Halfling
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Re: What am I?

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