Um, hello.

So, I finally found out that there was a name for what I am.

Wow. imagine that.

I seem to be an old lady compared to the profiles on this forum--I'm in my forties. I have been married for 20 years. Before that I could count my lovers (male and female) on my fingers and still have some left over. I just thought I was repressed.

Many people have accused me of being something of a "church lady" because of this (and other reasons). Which is funny because there's actually few things I disaprove of (no harm, no foul I've always figured).

I just started exploring what Asexuality is and ran across the term "demi". OMG! That's Me! If I don't have a deep emotional attachment to someone, I cannot have sex with them.

It was a severe problem when I was young, because I twice was deeply, emotionall attatched to abusive bastards. I wonder how common this is? I stayed with both of them because at the time, I couldn't imagine having sex with anyone else, ever.

Now I am married to a wonderful person, which is good, but it was a long road here.

So, um, yeah. That's me. Hello.

Welcome to the DG! Let us know if we can help you with anything while you are here.

Histories of abuse probably aren't the root of all or even most people on the ace spectrum, but we can see how it would contribute, certainly.

Nodding.

I think the history of abuse is a side issue--not the reason I became involved with these people, but part of the reason I stayed for so long.

I doubt its the reason for my orientation or my desire levels, but it certainly influences how I react.